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April 10 , 2007

Grace and Strength After an Abortion
by Reverend Rebecca Turner

Reverend Rebecca Turner, the executive director of the Missouri Religious Coalition for Reproductive Choice, is a minister in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ). She provides All Options Clergy Counseling to women who are considering abortion and provides reproductive loss counseling to individuals who have suffered a loss. Both All Options Clergy Counseling and Reproductive Loss Counseling are programs of the Religious Coalition for Reproductive Choice.

In the days immediately following an abortion, a woman may experience dramatic shifts in her emotions. She may feel relief, joy, sadness, shame, freedom, and fear all at once or within a short time span. She may be quite confused by the conflicting emotions. Some of this can be attributed to pregnancy hormones, but she may interpret it as regret or even as God trying to tell her something. It is very important that a woman have trusted people to whom she can turn during these days. Helping her identify these people before the abortion is critical. She needs to know there are friends, family, and/or clergy who do not judge her, who will listen to her feelings without interpreting them, and who will give her encouragement to plan her future.

If she does not have this system of support and instead shares the abortion with no one, she may view the event as a dirty secret. Such secrets increase one’s sense of shame and worthlessness. Spiritual health cannot be achieved when a woman is afraid to share her secret and lets it fester for years.

Women often ask if God will ever forgive them. Some women have trouble forgiving themselves. An older woman, confessing her long-held secret, may renew this question as she considers her own mortality. It is a tough question for those of us who do not see abortion as sin, and therefore not requiring forgiveness. But I do believe that God is always forgiving. The Bible says For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God. (Romans 8:38-39) I believe that God knows that a woman has done the best she could with her difficult life choices, and that God is always ready to welcome her with open arms. I believe that God loves her and watches over her every day of her life, including the day that she had an abortion.

Spiritual health, like mental health and physical health, fluctuates over the years and is impacted by the changing circumstances of our lives. Every spiritual question is an opportunity to help women face the difficulties of their lives with grace and strength.

It is profoundly important to help women connect with supportive clergy. The Religious Coalition for Reproductive Choice and its state affiliates offer counseling to women who are considering abortion, and those who want to discuss their feelings after an abortion. RCRC offers specialized training for clergy to counsel women who have experienced any reproductive loss.

Is there such a thing as Post Abortion Stress Syndrome?
The American Psychological Association and the American Psychiatric Association have reviewed all of the research concerning women’s mental health after an abortion, and they have concluded that abortion does not put one at an increased risk for mental disorders. They do not recognize PASS as a diagnosis.

This is not to say that having an abortion is not a major event in a woman’s life or that she may not express difficult emotions about the abortion. Most women consider their options very carefully and the decision to have an abortion is not easy. A crisis pregnancy is a crisis because of the problems that surround it. These problems may be related to family, finances, health, or relationships. The problems were not created by the abortion experience and they do not go away after an abortion. The woman must still find ways to cope with the difficulties in her life.

If a woman is not mentally or emotionally healthy prior to an abortion, research indicates she may be at high risk for emotional conflict following the procedure. This is even truer if her normal support system of family and friends articulate strong religious values that condemn abortion. Trained counselors often advise women experiencing severe emotional difficulties or engaging in destructive behaviors to seek medical attention.

Many women say that although the decision to have an abortion was painful and caused them grief, they still know it was the right decision for them at that time. With spiritual support, an unwanted pregnancy and an abortion can provide a unique opportunity for a woman to take charge of her life and to come to more mature understandings of the nature of God and God’s role in her life. Religious support can and should comfort and strengthen.

Is the abortion clinic a place of prayer?
For many women, the beginning of spiritual health might happen in the abortion clinic. This is a radical concept for many.

The unwanted or problem pregnancy is first and foremost a spiritual crisis. It is a spiritual crisis because a woman may connect the pregnancy with God’s purpose for her in the world, her morality, her ability to create a future, her satisfaction with her life circumstances, and her beliefs about life and death. Many clinics now provide chaplains who can speak to women about their concerns. Others invite clergy to train their counselors to be sensitive and responsive to religious issues presented.

No clinic will pressure a woman into having an abortion.

What is the purpose of PASS programs and retreats?
Women should beware of programs and retreats that say they have the solution to post-abortion stress syndrome. They attract women who have had abortions and are eager to talk to other women about their experience. These programs all begin with one assumption: every abortion is a sin that must be confessed. Once in these manipulative programs, women are encouraged to say they feel guilty, to see themselves as victims of the culture, and then to take action against the abortion providers. This is not a respectful approach. It preys upon the questions a woman may have and may promote a protracted and unhealthy sense of guilt. .

The religious leaders of the Religious Coalition for Reproductive Choice respect women and take all of their experiences seriously. We want women to be happy and healthy and to gain strength from their religious beliefs in all circumstances.

Learn more:

Myths and misinformation about abortion

Taking Women Seriously, by Mary Hunt

April 3, 2007